Calm Down Dearest // Memory Lane

As I was digging around in an old draw today trying to find my beloved Natalie Imbruglia CD (yep, you’re right – just for the inlay) I found some classic old school memorabilia. When I say old school, I mean it in the literal sense. My classic ‘leavers book’, where all your school friends write something lovely in it before you all go off to live your lives… or like most of the people at our school did, attend at the same college so see them in six weeks after the holidays. At the time though, it was a pretty big thing.

I’ve genuinely enjoyed reading through some of the classic comments people left for me in this ‘leavers book’ though:

JS – “We played in the same football team and you scored one of the best free kicks I’ve ever seen.
Nice knowing you”

PW – “I’ve known you since you popped out… U’ve had so many different haircuts some not so

DW – “5 years, well nearly! During this time I have come to respect you and your… shall we
say unique ways”

AW – “You’re a really nice lad. I think the only problem is your jokes… eventually I got used
to them, I suppose lol”

Classic. And my personal favourite: GD – “I hope u get a really fit bird with nice babalons”. What a touching sentiment. I can confirm I did score the best free kick anyone’s ever seen…

I wasn’t just leaving secondary school behind, but a huge chunk of my life that I’ll never get to experience again. It was a brilliant school, if only because they refused to hire anyone who didn’t have a name plastered in irony. There was Dr. Organ who taught biology, Mrs Cook who taught cookery, Mr Wood… yep he taught design and technology – woodwork and best of all, I shit you not, my music teacher, Mrs Tune. Pah! I mean, seriously what were they trying to do to us! That trip down memory lane has left me a tad teary eyed. So, CD inlay in hand I’m going for a crank (for those of you that want to know, it’s an adjective for sobbing uncontrollably whilst touching yourself – a crying wank; crank).